“What’s on the surface always looks like one big party but inside there is a little boy looking for help and guidance.”
Can you relate to what Chris Brown is saying? We can. He is talking about self-leadership. The ability to lead yourself is essential and Brown, who has had many scrapes with the law, is being honest about what is causing him to go astray despite his musical success. He lacks guidance and, as a result, is still a ‘child’.
How Does This Happen To Us ?
Many of us, like Brown, feel kind of lost. Why is this so?
Many of us have not been guided to get to know who we are and whose we are and to understand our mission in life. Without this knowledge we cannot effectively ‘grow up’ or truly achieve our personal best.
Where Does This Guidance Need To Come From?
Ideally from our Fathers/father figures. Chris Brown like many African/ African American men grew up lacking stable and positive fathering. His parents divorced when he was 6 and his step-father was abusive. Why is this relevant? The father plays a VITAL role in helping a child attain mature adulthood.
In an ideal household, knowledgeable fathers use their God-given authority to name their children (establish identity) and claim them as their own (giving them a sense of belonging).
This validation, along with a mother’s instruction in the principles of life, provides children with the safety and the information to ask and answer the questions: Who am I?, What is my mission? and Whose Am I?
When this does not happen then, despite any outward success we may have, we fall short of being the adults we yearn to be.
If you are a true Christian then you also have a Heavenly Father – God – who will provide the best guidance of all (if you let Him). After all He created you!
Why Is Knowing Myself So Important?
In Ghana, at home and at school, we are often discouraged from knowing ourselves. Often well-meaning parents and teachers believe that it is safer for children to avoid standing out of the crowd because people who do so are often targeted in our P.H.D. (Pull Him Down) society. But we have got it back to front!
It is precisely because we don’t know ourselves and how much potential each of us has, that we spend our time and our energy pulling down others whom we see as threats!
When we know that we are unique and have a unique life mission then we understand that no one can take this calling away from us unless we willingly surrender it.
What Happens When I Don’t Know Myself?
When we don’t know ourselves the consequences are far-reaching.
Partnerships are a problem as, because we don’t know our mission in life, we don’t know what we are offering to potential partners. Also we cannot tell if what they are offering us is in line with our mission as we don’t know it!
Parenting is also a problem. Can we offer our children what we ourselves have not been given? Chris Brown is now a father, has he been guided to discover himself and his life’s mission so he can help his children to do the same?
Our leadership potential is also diminished. There may be many people out there whose greatness relies on us discovering our God-given missions!
How Can I Achieve My Personal Best?
If you believe that the time has come for you to lead yourself, we are here to help. This site, our courses and associated books, as well as our entertaining audio and video programs, are all designed to help we Ghanaians achieve our God-given greatness!
…. Do You Know What It Is For? There is no end of talent shows on TV helping to create
Roberta is fed up with life. She looks back on her past and realizes that people have always taken advantage of her. Now she has found out that her boyfriend, to whom she lost her virginity, is cheating on her. She feels like her life is over.
Albert has always been envious of those classmates of his who have ‘made it’. One friend, Kojo, always knew he wanted to be an artist. They all used to laugh at him in school but now his is a very successful interior decorator. This boy has even built a small community centre for the youth in his area.
I used to be very shy and felt very inferior. These negative attitudes and feelings prevented me from exploiting the gifts and talents in me. I felt worthless and I was intimidated by people especially those whom I thought were lucky in life and had “made it”. I blamed my family, my country and even God.
Picture:_cbudd / Pixabay