Does your life make sense to you? (artsysolomon / Pixabay)
Roberta is fed up with life. She looks back on her past and realizes that people have always taken advantage of her – her stepmother used her like a slave in her provisions store and when she finally escaped home and got to boarding school her peers made her take the blame for their trouble-making. At work her co-workers fabricated stories about her which her boss believed and she was sacked. Now she has found out that her boyfriend, to whom she lost her virginity, is cheating on her. She feels like her life is over.
Roberta does not really know who she is, she has never been helped to understand and appreciate her true value. She looks down on herself.
The way we treat ourselves is the way most others will treat us. But it does not have to be this way.
Everything that is going to make you great is already within you! The act of polishing diamonds does not actually create the diamonds – they have already been created; they just need to be discovered and processed. This applies to all precious minerals, how much more precious are you!
We are all made in God’s image and no one got more of His image than the other! You, like all of us, have GREAT value.
Why Do I Need To Know Myself?
Imagine spending your whole life with someone who, as the decades go by, remains a stranger to you? You would not feel comfortable. Yet many of us are comfortable enough to go through life being strangers to ourselves! Not only that but we often look to others to tell us who we are. We will never fulfill our full potential this way.
Many of us in Ghana were brought up by parents who confused humility with timidity. They often insulted us and beat us in public trying to shame us into being humble but they actually made a lot of us timid. Humility and timidity are two different things.
Humility is thinking of yourself less (not being proud) it is not thinking less of yourself (looking down on yourself in low confidence.)
Humility is a CHOICE; you cannot be beaten or shamed into having humility.
How Do I Get To Know Myself?
Knowing yourself means defining yourself based on what lies within you rather than trying to live up to popular external images of who you think family, friends or popular culture say you should be.
Ghana is very much a ‘for show’ country where the appearance of people and things is often more important than how things actually are. We will borrow money to buy the latest phone, car and nice clothes when we still live in a rented, single room and struggle to pay our rent. Defining yourself based on things outside you – money, cars, houses, sex etc. – does not help you to know yourself. You need to look inside you.
Knowing yourself is about discovering the chain that links your interests, passions and talents. It is about knowing the strengths and natural limitations of your personality traits which can be identified with simple tests.
Knowing yourself is also about defining the values you hold, why you hold them and if they are working for or against you in your life.
When you know yourself then you value yourself. Roberta lacks boundaries in her life which she needs to stop others from coming in and out of her life and taking advantage of her.
You can find out more about discovering yourself in my upcoming workbook.